Saturday, October 15, 2022

Character Analysis: Problem Sleuth

Background

  • Name: Problem Sleuth (commonly shortened to PS)
  • Character Rating: Suitor to the Sodajerk's Confidante
  • Pulchritude Gained: 42,005
  • Alliegance: The Four Kingdoms
  • Female Alter Ego: Hysterical Dame
  • Gambit Schema: Candy Corn Vampire
  • Likes: consoling dames, solving cases, candy corn, busts
  • Dislikes: The Mobster Kingpin, being stuck in his office when there are dames to rescue
Problem Sleuth is one of many private investigators taking office in the Boulangere District of Downtown Midnight City. He's had a long and successful career as a sleuth. He has a penchant for monologuing in old 30's noir style at times, and it's a bit difficult to figure out what he's talking about occasionally. But, all the same, he helps out hysterical dames and makes ends meet. Compensation is adequate, and life is good.

But, on a balmy summer afternoon, PS finds himself trapped within the confines of his own office. Through a series of needlessly convoluded weird puzzle shit, he charges headlong into the adjacent Imaginary Universe, forming alliances with his hallmates Ace Dick and Pickle Inspector as well as solving crises between the Elves, the Hogs, the Clowns, and the Weasels. Through great adversity and yet even more weird shit, he finds himself face to face with the Mobster Kingpin, the under-the-hood mob boss ruler of the city. Valiantly, he and his allies dwindle down MK's forces and transformations, eventually ending his reign of terror for good.

Oh yeah, and they also made it out of their offices.


Equipment


Handgun/Key



"The grip is cold against your palm. This is your only friend in the world right now. It's gonna be a long night."

Problem Sleuth's initial weapon/lock-opening apparatus. Sometimes, it's a key. Sometimes, it's a handgun. Whatever's most convenient. The handgun has a six-round chamber and can be fired just as a normal pistol would.

Problem Sleuth would eventually trade the Handgun/Key for the Tommy Gun/Ring of Keys, which initially belonged to Ace Dick. The Key/Handgun would then go to Pickle Inspector, as his more frail physique couldn't handle a gun any larger.

The Handgun/Key, as well as the Tommy Gun/Ring of Keys and the Minigun/Hairpin were all sacrificed in order to unlock the Demonhead Mobster Kingpin's mask, but all three weapons were eventually replaced upon the adventure's conclusion, as all three can be seen in the final panel.

Tommy Gun/Ring of Keys



"Armed with your TOMMY GUN, you are one hard boiled lug. Nobody mess with this tough guy, see?"

A medium weight firearm initially wielded by Ace Dick, but bequeathed upon Problem Sleuth upon finding a weapon more deserving of his strength. It holds roughly 100 rounds per barrel and functions as a normal Tommy gun.

The Tommy Gun/Ring of Keys, as well as the Handgun/Key and the Minigun/Hairpin were all sacrificed in order to unlock the Demonhead Mobster Kingpin's mask, but all three weapons were eventually replaced upon the adventure's conclusion, as all three can be seen in the final panel.

Candy Corn Handgun




The Candy Corn Handgun was bequeathed to Problem Sleuth by Pickle Inspector's imaginatory abilities. It is much more potent than his regular handgun, as it was able to do substantial damage to a Beast while his normal Handgun failed to scratch it.

He eventually lost the Candy Corn Handgun upon being eaten by a Beast.

Trusty Knives



Problem Sleuth never leaves home without his jacket full of Trusty Knives. Upon the heightened potential of his Clemency Owl's hysteria, he can release his Parliament Uproar!, aptly titled Trusty Knives.

Royal Chemistry Set & Munitions Bag



After authoring the treaty between the four kingdoms, Problem Sleuth was gifted with two artifacts of the Weasel Kingdom.

The Royal Chemistry Set contains 100 Elf Tears, 100 Weasel Snots, 100 Hog Slops, and 100 Pie Fillings. These are reagents that Problem Sleuth uses for his various battle techniques. More on those later.

The Munitions Bag contains 1000 rounds of Handgun ammo, 10000 rounds of Tommy Gun ammo, 100000 rounds of Minigun ammo, a battery pack, and an extention cord. Safe to say that PS isn't running out of ammo for his guns anytime soon.

Peppermint Mythril Coat



A candied breastplate crafted by Future Pickle Inspector and gifted to you to fight the first phase of Demonhead Mobster Kingpin. It negates all incoming damage, instead redirecting that damage towards the durability of the armor.

It was eventually destroyed during the battle.

Jawbreaker Skylight Bomb



In an effort to do a hefty amount of damage to the Demonhead Mobster Kingpin, Problem Sleuth came up with a plan. Using two portable portals resembling skylights, he creates a quantum impossibility in the palm of his hand in the form of an infinitely capsizing fractal. With some help from Future Pickle Inspector, it was sealed inside of a hard jawbreaker exterior. With enough force, the bomb implodes upon itself, creating a massive physics-defying explosion.

Death's Scythe



"You strike a diplomatic bargain with Death and receive a boon."

After using Combat Operandi -> Armistyx, Problem Sleuth was able to summon Death to his current location and strike a diplomatic bargain with the reaper. This allowed him temporary usage of Death's Scythe, a powerful artifact that is both a strong weapon as well as a whole host of items due to object duality. These objects include the following...
  • A teaspoon
  • A ball point pen
  • A jousting lance
  • A bullhorn
  • A calculator
  • An anti-tank rocket launcher
  • A trombone
  • A fort
  • A rocket launcher
  • The Bowen Stilson Dogg
  • A dollhouse
  • The Labrynthine Sudocube Comprehsensile
  • A romance novel
  • A baby grand piano
  • T-Rex from Dinosaur Comics
  • A Fancy Santa
  • An ugly dog
  • An F-16
  • The head of Manny Calavera
  • An atomic bomb
In its own right, Death's Scythe is an incredibly potent weapon. Combined with Gambit Schema -> Candy Corn Vampire, Problem Sleuth was able to completely counteract Demonhead Mobster Kingpin's regenerative properties during his second phase as well as eventually destroying an entire health bar.

After transforming into an atomic bomb, the scythe was destroyed. Death eventually got a new one, though.

Tectrixcalibur/Tectrix of the Arbitor



The most powerful weapon in the Weasel Kingdom, ironically both a pen and a sword. While in the form of the Tectrix of the Arbitor, it is little more than a simple feather. While others have attempted to use it for combat purposes, their efforts ultimately failed due to a lack of experience in Tickletech.

However, while taking the form of Tectrixcalibur, the weapon is fit for a Chosen Arbitor. Using the power of Righteous Aggression, he easily severed through several of Demonhead Mobster Kingpin's health bars and was able to effortless cleave through the Briers of Cruelty.

Ink of Squid Pro Quo



The Ink of Squid Pro Quo fills the Flask slot of Problem Sleuth's inventory and serves as the scabbard for Tectrixcalibur. Its ink reserve serves as the timer for Sepulchritude as well as the method for refilling the Smith Corona Blotspitter. When emptied, it releases a powerful explosion of raw charisma.

Smith Corona Blotspitter/Typewriter



"Dispatcher of the despotic; Convincer of the uncompelled; It is one of several fabled holy weapons reserved for the CHOSEN ARBITOR, sealed and protected by the realm's hallowed figures of nobility."

The Smith Corona Blotspitter is the most powerful firearm in Problem Sleuth's arsenal. Gifted to him by the Demimonde Semigoddess, it is an ancient holy weapon that uses ink ribbon cartridges as ammunition.

In its normal form, it is a typewriter. Problem Sleuth used the typewriter to draft an unpleasant note towards the Demonhead Mobster Kingpin. This note served as further ammunition for the Smith Corona Blotspitter, initiating LV. 99 Sleuth Diplomacy: Pax Probliscum, an attack that effortlessly destroyed one of DMK's health bars.


Combat Operandi


Sleuth Diplomacy



"Allows you to acquaint recipient with your brand of diplomacy."

Sleuth Diplomacy is Problem Sleuth's most commonly used special attack. It levels up repeatedly throughout the adventure, having different effects depending on the level. Each Sleuth Diplomacy costs 1 Elf Tear to use. However, as higher levels are used, they tend to levy the material cost.
  • LV. 1: Problem Sleuth fires his tommy gun.
  • LV. 2 : Problem Sleuth fires his tommy gun... while smoking a cigarette.
  • LV. 5 - Impromptu Caucus: As Problem Sleuth fires his tommy gun, two Ace Dicks appear and fire their miniguns in support.
  • LV. 10 - Ceasefire: Problem Sleuth drops his tommy gun and beats the target up with his bare hands instead.
  • LV. 98 - Poison Pen Letter: Problem Sleuth writes a nasty and unpleasant letter directed towards the target. The sick burn of the letter bypasses invulnerability, opening up the target for devastating attacks. Requires Sepultritude.
  • LV. 99 - Pax Probliscum: Used in conjunction with Poison Pen Letter. Problem Sleuth loads the unpleasant letter into the Smith Corona Blotspitter and fires a devastating shot. Requires Sepultritude,

Fair Shake



"You give equal consideration to both sides of the argument."

Fair Shake is a combination attack. Pulling out a skylight, Problem Sleuth opens fire on the target while Ace Dick fires his minigun through the skylight.

Brass Tacks



"They're all blind as a bat, and full of piss and vinegar."

At the cost of 3000 spondulicks, Problem Sleuth summons forth the three greatest jazz musicians of all time: Blind Willie "Buttermilk" Stubbs, Father "Blind Pappy" Ramblin' Jackson, and Earl Stokes "Can't-see-a-damn" Molasses Fatts. Using their avant-garde jazz powers, they rain down jazz instruments on the enemy in a brutal cacaophony of woodwind and brass.

Summon Henry Clay



"The Great Compromiser wheels and deals on your behalf, for a fee."

For a slightly more wallet-denting sum of 3500 spondulicks, as well as 1 Weasel Snot and 3 Pie Filling, Problem Sleuth summons forth the former Kentucky senator Henry Clay to fight on his behalf. His signature move, Pacify, is sure to deal with any threat in a peaceful and non-threatening manner.

Parliament Uproar! Trusty Knives



"If you didn't have your TRUSTY KNIVES, you think you'd slit your wrists."

As soon as the Clemency Owl starts hooting up a storm, it's time to release a Parliament Uproar! Problem Sleuth's is Trusty Knives, in which he bombards the target with a brutal affront of knives.

Yeah, that's about it.

Call for Aid



"The kingdoms assemble four of their mightiest heroes to come to your aid, the WEASEL WARRIOR, the ELF MAGE, the HOG CLERIC, and the CLOWN BARD."

Through his alliance formed with all four kingdoms, Problem Sleuth telepathically calls for the mighiest heroes to aid him in battle. These heroes consist of the following:
  • The Weasel Warrior is the hero sent by the Weasel Kingdom. He is a master at flipping the fuck out, which is the pinnacle of weasel martial arts.
  • The Elf Mage is the hero sent by the Elf Kingdom. He is capable of conjuring large eggs to crush his enemies, as well as being good at sneakin' around.
  • The Hog Cleric is the hero sent by the Hog Kingdom. Using his Crook of Fealty, he is able to cast Porcine Intervention, a spell which brings a deceased individual back to life.
  • The Clown Bard is the hero sent by the Clown Kingdom. He's good at lute solos.
The Four Heroes have no cost to summon and last indefinitely.

Summon Weasel King



"The gloves are off. It's finally time to call on His Majesty's services."

After expending 4 Elf Tears and 4 Weasel Snot, Problem Sleuth beckons forth the Weasel King, who promptly flips the fuck out. This does heavy damage to the opponent before the Weasel King returns to his realm.

Summon Moe



"You call forth the blistering white hot fury that is MOE."

"..."

"You unsummon MOE. MOE will be of absolutely no use to you in this battle whatsoever."

Gambit Schema: Candy Corn Vampire



"Terrifying GAMBIT AETHERS flow from the supernatural gourd and permeate your ARTIFICE AMBIENT. You undergo an incredible transformation."

Upon carving his Gambit Schema into the Schema Pumpkin, Problem Sleuth gained access to a haunting transformation: the Candy Corn Vampire. This transformation boosts his physical stats greatly, making him much more physically capable of taking on powerful enemies such as Demonhead Mobster Kingpin's second form. Most notably, it increases his speed tremendously, allowing him to dodge incoming attacks as quick as a blur.

The transformation only lasts as long as the Schema Pumpkin rots: if the pumpkin fully rots, the transformation expires. Additionally, enough damage would extinguish the pumpkin's flicker, also ending the transformation.

Armistyx



"You summon Death from his macabre realm, or wherever the hell he was when you called him away."

At the cost of 3 Hog Slop, 2 Pie Filling, and 1 Elf Tear, Problem Sleuth summons Death in order to make a deal in exchange for power. In the one instance in which Problem Sleuth has used this ability, Death gifted its Scythe to Problem Sleuth in order to combat the Demonhead Mobster Kingpin, though it can be assumed that Death can help in other ways.

Final Rave: Sepulchritude


"PEACE BE WITH YOU."

As a final ace in the hole, and at a whopping cost of 36 Elf Tears, 12 Weasel Snot, 18 Hog Slop, and 29 Pie Filling, Problem Sleuth engulfs himself in the righteous fire of charisma. This transformation gives Problem Sleuth a vast increase in strength, speed, and stamina, as well as granting him flight and a constant aura of personal charm that constantly does damage to those around him.

While in Sepulchritude, Problem Sleuth gains access to a few unique abilities, including the final two levels of Sleuth Diplomacy as well as a couple of brand new ones. Upon Sepulchritude's end, the universe is enveloped in the burning vigor of Problem Sleuth's charisma in a final devastating attack. Problem Sleuth is then knocked out.

Righteous Aggression



"Righteous fires of charisma wipe out the brier. The resplendent light of divine PULCHRITUDE consumes your spirit."

A devastating attack with Tectrixcalibur, Problem Sleuth proceeds to write, ratify, and demolish various treaties and laws, causing immense damage to the target. One usage of Righteous Aggresion was enough to destroy one of Final Form Demonhead Mobster Kingpin's health bars

Final Flip Out





"The souls of the ARBITOR and the KING merge as one. The prophecy was true. Destiny flips the fuck out."

Upon fusing spirits with the Weasel King, Problem Sleuth promptly flips the fuck out. Each swing is able to destroy several health bars at once, eventually culminating in the destruction of an infinite number of health bars.

FAQ


Since there'll probably be a lot of questions due to the nature of MSPA and Problem Sleuth's narrative complexity, I'll try to explain the most frequently asked questions to the best of my ability.

Didn't Hussie say that nothing is faster than light?


Yep. Still doesn't fix some of the glaring plot holes that statement makes if we were to apply it to his verses. It's best to just avoid it in most regards; he even says the whole "don't worry about it, it's just a cartoon" spiel at the end, so it's not to be taken with much sincerity.

How big is the Problem Sleuth universe?


The universe in which the fight with Demonhead Mobster Kingpin takes place is repeatedly stated to be 18 billion lightyears across. Surprisingly enough, this is substantially smaller than our own universe, which measures 93 billion lightyears across. However, this isn't where the universe ends.

There's still the matter of String Theory, which is accepted as fact within the Problem Sleuth universe via the extra-dimensional cosmic superstring strata. As such, the verse exists on a twelve-dimensional scale rather than a three-dimensional one.

There's also the afterlife, which exists as a fractal inside a flower owned by Godhead Pickle Inspector. Fractals have a theoretically infinite perimeter, which would imply that the afterlife is infinitely layered as well.

Then there's the Game of Life, which is treated as an equal dimension to the afterlife. It also houses Bard Quest. That's another universe.

Then there's Black Hole Mobster Kingpin, who was able to obtain a mass larger than the universe to the power of 100. That's a googol, for you math nerds. A mass such as that alone would be enough to qualify for Multi. (Not Multi+, since the quantity of universes is finite, albeit large.)

Needless to say, there's a lot of shit going on that would boost the size of Problem Sleuth's cosmology. to varying degrees of infinity.

The only character that would likely scale to the full cosmology is Godhead Pickle Inspector, who single-handedly created the universe across all of time. This would likely carry over to the Homestuck cosmology as well, for reasons established later.

How does time travel work in Problem Sleuth?


Problem Sleuth operates off of the theory of temporal mutability, which establishes that the past cannot be directly changed, but rather every change that time travel makes has already been set into motion. It follows the concept of destiny and fate with how it handles manipulation to the timeline.

Time operates on a single timeline. Every time a version of Pickle Inspector splits itself across time, its effects are witnessed within real time. We see the effects of PPI's efforts in real time as they happen, as witnessed when Ace Dick reloads a save in order to see a puzzle already solved. Later, it was revealed that a time-travelling Pickle Inspector was the one responsible, pushing the idea that all time travel events are fated to happen. 

This is even supported by Hussie himself, as he describes Temporal Repliscimum Ad Infinitum as "stock(ing) every moment in time with every particle in the universe." Multiverse theory does not exist within the Problem Sleuth universe.

...except for when it does.

Do Problem Sleuth and Homestuck exist within the same canon?


Homestuck loves to play with the concept of multiverses. The Genesis Frog is showing of that, as it contains infinite self-contained timelines

You'd think this goes against the precedent set within Problem Sleuth, right? Since Pickle Inspector's time travel functions entirely differently from, let's say, Dave's abilities. Well, that would make sense, if Problem Sleuth didn't directly appear in the Homestuck Epilogues. Not to mention the several instances where they've crossed over with The Midnight Crew. This isn't helped by the fact that canon is a tangible concept within the Homestuck universe and is undermined as often as it is adhered to.

While this doesn't imply direct scaling in many aspects, it would certainly establish the fact that the two worlds share a greater cosmology than what the original comic presents. We can assume that the Problem Sleuth universe is at least tangentally connected to the main Homestuck universe via the Genesis Frog, if not the same universe altogether.

This has a lot of implications.

Firstly, this means that all crossovers that happened with characters and concepts that extend beyond the Problem Sleuth universe are dubiously canon. Meaning that the Problem Sleuths in their base forms should physically scale to the Midnight Crew


I'm going to stray away from these two instances due to them being ultimately unfaithful to the character's original interpretation. The extras are dubiously canon, regardless. I'm mainly using Homestuck as a base for the larger cosmology of Problem Sleuth as a whole. Granted, Sleuth himself likely doesn't scale, but it's good to cover regardless.

Given that, I'm going to assume that the Problem Sleuth universe is one of infinite similar yet different timelines residing within the Genesis Frog, meaning that the Godhand Pickle Inspector is not just the creator of the Problem Sleuth universe but rather the one responsible for the conceptualization of an infinite amount of universes within the Genesis Frog, at least. This puts GPI comfortably at Hyperversal due to creating a construct of infinite timelines, possibilities, and outcomes within a 12-dimensional context.

And, with that, I think that's all the mind-bending Homestuck shit. Back to the actual topic at hand.

Feats


Overall


  • Successfully defeated Mobster Kingpin and obtained the Megaton Key
  • Brought peace to the four nations of Elves, Hogs, Weasels, and Clowns
  • Observed the entire history and future of the universe before his very eyes
  • Filled all eight levels of the Impetus Comb to achieve the Final Rave
  • Navigated the Chicago Overcoat
  • Ascended all five levels of Mobster Kingpin's Tower
  • Defeated Flthulu
  • Left his office

AP/Durability

Base

Candy Corn Vampire

Sepulchritude


Speed

Base

Sepulchritude


Summary


"A hard boiled lug like you has seen enough weepy lamps and spoiled makeup jobs to know what the matter is. What the matter is there's a problem. And you'll be damned if you aren't gonna be the fellas to sleuth it."

  • Varying stats, depending on his current form
    • Base:
      • AP: Wall physically, higher with weapons and summons
      • Speed: Supersonic
      • Durability: Multiversal
    • Candy Corn Vampire:
      • AP: Universal through Death's Scythe
      • Speed: FTL
      • Durability: Multiversal
    • Sepulchritude:
      • AP: Hyperversal
      • Speed: Infinite/Immeasurable
      • Durability: Hyperversal
  • Several firearms and weapons
  • Enough ammo to last through most fights
    • This includes physical ammo, such as bullets, as well as magical reagents for using abilities, such as Elf Tears and Weasel Snot
  • A plethora of summons to keep opponents busy, including Brass Tacks, Henry Clay, the Four Heroes, the Weasel King, Death, and Moe
    • Revival through the Hog Cleric
  • Extreme amounts of versatility through Death's Scythe's various transformations
  • Ungodly high charisma to a reality-breaking extent
  • Potent AOE through Sepulchritude
  • Durability Negation through Poison Pen Letter

Possible Opponents


Henry Stickmin



Probably my preferred for Problem Sleuth. The Cops vs Robbers aesthetic of it as well as their massive arsenals bouncing off of one another would make for an interesting animation. It's probably pretty debatable too, though I doubt Henry has anything to match the raw power of Sepulchritude.

Joker



This makes so much sense it's almost disturbing.

Gun-toting members of rag-tag squadrons, one of law enforcement and the other of criminals, that dive into the mind in order to defeat a morally corrupt individual that assumes a monstrous form, all with their own set of special summons and undeniable charisma? It's kind of perfect.

PS throwing out all of his summons against Joker's Personas with a Sepulchritude vs Satanael finale sounds absolutely raw, and I don't know how I feel about that.

Alex Eggleston



Memes aside, this is kind of bad. I think it has some merit, but not nearly enough to make me think it's better than any of either's other options.

Closing Words


Thank you for sticking with me through this one. As my first foray into character blogs rather than matchup blogs, I decided to go with a character that would turn my brain into more of a knot than anybody else I've covered before. I swear, if I ever cover a character more confusing than this I think I'll go crazy.

In the meantime, have a little taste of what's in store for the next installment. I've been rather vocal about creating this one, so it may not come as a shock to most, but I figured I'd celebrate the occasion.

Monday, December 6, 2021

Death Battle Prediction: Giovanni Potage vs Papyrus

Giovanni Potage, the former Captain of the Banzai Blasters and wielder of the epithet Soup.

The Great Papyrus, the protégé to Royal Guard Undyne and sentinel of Snowdin.

Aspirations for greatness do not come easily. Those with the drive to improve, impress, and climb the social ladder are destined to find a comfortable place in life. However, what happens if the path you've devoted yourself to forces you to do things you don't agree with? These two were once young and hopeful, eager to be certified bad dudes in a legion of powerful teammates. However, after a chance encounter with a young child, they gained a new perspective on themselves. They immediately took a liking toward the child, guiding them through their adventure, before being forced to confront their superiors. With courage, they defied their higher-ups and devoted their remaining time to helping out their new friends. With their over-the-top attitudes and attacks themed around Italian cuisine, these two have a shell of iron, but a heart of gold.

While both of these characters may seem underwhelming in what they can dole out, their personalities and charm encapsulate the audience to an extent that any amount of power can't even begin to achieve. Giovanni's series is still verdant, but he has more than enough going for him to take a stand as he is now. Papyrus hails from one of the most beloved indie games of all time, with tons of material to boot. Will Giovanni be able to land a home run, or will Papyrus finally capture the human he's been waiting for? Let's find out who would win in a Death Battle!


Background


Giovanni Potage



Originally living as an unassuming civilian, Giovanni always had a dream to become the world's greatest supervillain. So, he used his free time to join the Banzai Blasters, a large, totally-not-a-pyramid-scheme organization of fellow ne'er-do-wells. Giovanni worked hard, making the most out of his seemingly mundane epithet until he was finally promoted to the second rank of the team: Banzai Captain. With his newfound rank, Giovanni was given a small task force of Banzai Blasters and tasked with ransacking the Sweet Jazz City Museum in search of "artifacts."

There, he would meet Molly Blyndeff, a young girl to who he immediately grew attached. Together, they bonded over their shared feelings of inadequacy until officially teaming up. Together, they caught the true threat looming inside of the museum and reported back to the Banzai Blasters with a mysterious amulet: The Arsene Amulet, a piece of magical jewelry capable of stealing epithets.

However, upon returning to the nearest Banzai Blaster camp in Redwood Run, he would witness the cruelty and rudeness on display that he was previously blind to, as he was mercilessly bullied by two of his superior officers, Bugsy and Arnold. This epiphany revealed the true nature of the Banzai Blasters to Giovanni, and he promptly quit the organization, vowing to become the greatest supervillain on his very own.

Papyrus



Presumably, a human in life, Papyrus and his brother Sans mysteriously arrived in a small town under Mt. Ebott called Snowdin. There, they took up residence, asserting themselves into the everyday lifestyle of the town. It was then that Papyrus met the Royal Guard, an elite squadron of soldiers that protect the town from any sort of danger. Papyrus had a chance meeting with the leader of the Guard, Captain Undyne, who saw a spark of greatness in the skeleton. It was then that Undyne began personally training Papyrus in combat.

Thus, Papyrus became an honorary in-training member of the Royal Guard, along with his brother. In order to receive a full induction into the Guard, the two brothers were tasked with a nearly impossible task: capture a human. To Undyne, this was nothing but a goose chase, to ensure that Papyrus would never have to face the brutal reality of what being a Royal Guard entails. But, to Papyrus, this was a challenge.

Without hesitation, Papyrus sunk countless hours into his task, setting up traps and sentry outposts all across the town. Eventually, the inevitable would happen, and a single human would stumble into the underground. Papyrus would waste no time attempting to capture the child, but he couldn't help but slowly grow closer to the child through his efforts. Culminating in a climactic battle at the border of Snowdin, Papyrus relinquished, letting the child walk free at the cost of his future as a guardsman.

Equipment


Giovanni


Soul Slugger


Officially titled the Soul Slugger Doom Bat of Maximum Destruction, this absolutely devastating tool was crafted by the ancient gods of war in the hopes that a legendary warrior would wield it to bring balance and order to the world as its rightful ruler with an iron fist. It struck down the ancient demons, including the infamous Balrog of Abaddon, with a single, swift blow. Even the mightiest deities tremble at the potential carnage brought by this holy fusion of brutality and finesse.

...

Not really. It's just a bat with a knife taped to the end, but Giovanni is pretty damn good at swinging it. He played baseball for the majority of his life, so he's naturally skilled when it comes to flinging around this long, wooden club. As one of his "special moves," he detaches the knife from the end and bats it at his opponent. Trust me, it works a lot better than it sounds.

Giovanni has also used the Soul Slugger to redirect attacks and force back summons from other Epithets. He's continuously batted away Sylvester's Counting Sheep and batted a ball of yarn hard enough to break Sylvie's concentration.

Ancient Potion


"It sounds gross, but it tastes great!"

A small vial filled with a soupy content made from Giovanni's own sweat. Once per battle, he can take a sip from it and fully recover himself. Although it takes a bit to consume, it allows Giovanni to completely negate any damage or fatigue that he might have accumulated during the fight. It also tastes like tomatoes and basil.

Papyrus


Traps and Japes


Throughout his quest to thoroughly boobytrap the path to Snowdin, Papyrus has been shown to have access to a variety of traps and weapons intended to automatically stop the human from progressing.
  • The Invisible Electricity Maze: A large, square area with invisible electric charges circling through the ground. Anybody that doesn't tread on the correct path gets shocked brutally. However, the shocks are administered through a crystal ball that must be given to the human before they enter the maze.
  • Frozen Spaghetti: A cunning jape that takes the visage of a frozen-over plate of spaghetti, its goal is to distract, entice, and ultimately coerce the human using its marvelous aroma of Italian flavor. The spaghetti is so completely frozen that even a microwave failed to thaw it.
  • The Multicolored Tile Puzzle: A technological contraption that creates a randomly generated maze with overly complicated rules. It backfired after being used once, but the concept was later recycled by Mettaton in his game show.
  • The Gauntlet of Deadly Terror: As Papyrus's ultimate puzzle, it consists of narrowing the human down to a precarious bridge then ambushing them with a variety of weapons. These weapons include:
    • Two spears
    • A burning torch
    • A large, spiked ball
    • A cannon
    • The Annoying Dog

Battle Body


Papyrus's very own hand-made armor. Originally crafted for a Halloween party, Papyrus refused to take it off afterward. Though flashy, it serves no additional purpose other than being a standard set of armor. Though, the insignia on the breast looks rather familiar...

Abilities


Giovanni


Epithet: Soup


"Makes a mean bisque. Literally."

In the world of Epithet Erased, one in every five people is born with a word inscribed in their souls, granting them magical powers based on the word. For some, these words are of incredible use, such as Barrier and Sundial. Others... are a bit more mundane. That's where Giovanni comes in with his very own Epithet: Soup.

With a Creativity ranking of 5, Soup is an incredibly versatile power, and it's all thanks to Giovanni's overflowing imagination. With the Epithet of Soup, Giovanni can create, contort, and manipulate soup in any quantity. It's like waterbending, but more delicious. 

While this Epithet isn't particularly strong in concept, it's Giovanni that makes the most of it. With his insane level of creativity paired with a desire to come off as intimidating as possible, the seemingly boring power of Soup becomes a mighty weapon.

Lava Acid Lavacid Grenade


Giovanni holds his hands to one side and summons a rolling, boiling mass of scalding hot soup before launching it at his opponent. It may burn, but it tastes delicious!

Demon Energy Aura


Giovanni concentrates his soupy energy, causing a steamy cloud of red mist to accumulate around his person. This steam has a variety of uses:
  • Demon Energy Blast: Giovanni releases the aura on his person, creating a massive updraft of soupy vapor. The gust was strong enough to clear an entire room of Sylvie's dust.
  • Teleports Behind You: Giovanni uses the propulsive power of the steam to launch himself forward at immense speeds. This can be used in combat to either position Giovanni behind his opponent or relocate him to a more advantageous spot.
  • Fog of Lost Souls: Giovanni releases a pleasant pink aroma with a consistency similar to pea soup. Anyone in the fog is slowly healed, their senses soothed by the aura.

Soup That Is Too Hot


Giovanni's self-proclaimed ultimate attack. It changes the temperature of any existing soup to be hot enough to burn his opponent's entire mouth. Delightfully devilish.

Critical 13


Completely unrelated to his epithet, Giovanni has a lucky number: 13. Obviously, this means that once every 13 times he attacks somebody, he gets a super powerful critical hit. These critical hits are substantially more powerful than anything else that he's able to dish out, and it applies to attacks using his Epithet as well. In addition, he can easily store a critical hit by lightly tapping objects until his 13th strike is ready. Kind of like counting cards.

...what? Doesn't your lucky number do that too?

Papyrus


Bone Attacks


Isn't it odd how, in many forms of media, skeletons are depicted as wielding bone versions of already existing weapons? Isn't that the skeleton equivalent of me smacking people over the head with a makeshift hammer made from a severed arm and a decapitated head?

Anyways, Papyrus has a plethora of bones that he can toss at his opponents. Short bones, long bones, big bones, cool bones, the list goes on. He even has a special variant of bone based on the cyan soul of Patience; if something stands completely still, it's impossible for the bone to hit them. This specific type of bone is useful for locking opponents in place, making it easier to hit them with the regular variety of bone.

Take a sip of water every time I say bone. I promise you'll be fully hydrated by the end of this blog.

Jump Form


Also referred to as his fabled Blue Attack, Papyrus can manipulate the very soul of his opponent in order to increase their personal gravity. Based on the powers of the soul of Integrity, he turns your soul a dark blue color, forcing you to the ground. This allows Papyrus to easily slow down or otherwise vertically limit quicker opponents. 

A more powerful version of the technique is also used by his brother, Sans, which allows him to shift and manipulate the flow of gravity entirely for the affected target. However, there's no definitive proof that Papyrus's version of the technique has access to the same ability.

It's not exactly clear why the two skeleton brothers have access to this soul-manipulating technique while other blatantly more powerful monsters such as Asgore don't even attempt to use it. Perhaps it has to do with who they were in life?

"Special" Attack


Every prominent monster in the underground has a signature, final onslaught that they dub their "special attack." Papyrus is no exception to this trend. His special attack is big! It's powerful! It's filled with the gumption and fortitude of a true member of the Royal Guard! It's...

...been stolen by a dog. Oh well. I guess his exceedingly long and absolutely normal attack will have to do. Filled with dogs, skateboards, and the overall spirit of a certified Cool Dude, this final barrage of bones is Papyrus's do-or-die gambit. 

The cascade begins with a standard array of bones coming from all sides, culminating in an absolutely massive bone that requires an equally massive jump to cross, not to mention the hundreds of bones littering the ground just so you can be sure where you're not supposed to be.

Naturally, the longevity of this attack tires Papyrus out, so he only uses it at the end of fights in order to conserve his energy. I guess that's why people never use their strongest attack first.

Reset Awareness


Now, I'm not entirely sure how germane this is to the context of a VS debate, but I feel like it's important enough to bring up. 

In UNDERTALE, the Human has the power to save, load, and reset the save file of the game, tinkering with the timeline in any way they deem fit. After restoring the timeline to a prior state, or resetting it entirely, the memories and experiences of all of the monsters under Mt. Ebbot are supposed to wipe, effectively giving the Human an infinite amount of chances to see events through in any way they like. 

However, there are a few characters that are aware of these temporal imbalances, most notably Flowey, as he comments on your various decisions throughout your journey, and Sans, who lectures you about how effectively unkillable you are at the end of a Genocide route due to this ability.

Though it isn't brought up much, Papyrus is still able to sense these changes in the timeline, although it's to a much more diluted extent than his brother. He experiences several cases of deja vu throughout repeat playthroughs, even to the extent of accurately predicting what the Human may or may not do.

Feats


Giovanni


Overall


  • Graduated to be a Captain of the Banzai Blasters
  • Defeated Sylvester Ashling, Indus Tarbella, and Mera Salamin with the assistance of Molly
  • Successfully stole the Arsene Amulet from the Sweet Jazz Museum
  • Evaded the Sweet Jazz City Police Department
  • Created a new identity as Vincent Murder
  • Remembers the names of all of his minions
  • Encouraged Molly to stand up for herself and her Epithet

Strength


  • Kicked a potted plant (and injured his foot)
  • Batted a knife hard enough to penetrate Dr. Beefton's hide
  • Batted away Sylvester's Counting Sheep, even destroying one with Critical 13
  • Kicked Bugsy across a room
  • Used his Demon Energy Aura to clear a room full of powder (1.09 megajoules)
  • Batted Mera into a wall with Critical 13 (39.06 megajoules)

Speed


  • Has moved quick enough to appear as if he is teleporting
  • Jumped to the top of a large aquarium while carrying Molly
  • Blitzed Mera and Indus (734.25 m/s)
  • Comparable to Bugsy, who is capable of catching shotgun blasts in his mouth (1430 m/s)
  • Was able to escape Percy following the theft of the Arsene Amulet
    • Percy was quick enough to react to instantaneous gunfire (622.22 m/s)

Durability


  • Took a beating from Dr. Beefton for an extended period of time
    • Dr. Beefton could shatter Mera's glass as if it were nothing
    • Dr. Beefton shrugged off an entire tower collapsing on him
  • Comparable to Car Crash who, as his name implies, has survived several car crashes
  • Took a massive hit from Indus Tarbella
    • Indus by himself is strong enough to crash through marble walls (188 megajoules)
    • Indus is physically strong enough to bench press trucks  (33.7 kilojoules)
    • Indus's barriers are strong enough to hold up an apatosaurus skeleton

Papyrus


Overall


  • Was recognized by Royal Guard Undyne for his potential
  • Chased the Human across the entire town of Snowdin
  • Maintains several complicated puzzles daily
  • Constantly endures his brother's puns
  • Stood up to Undyne when he chose to release the Human

Strength


  • Fought the Human on relatively even terms
  • Threw a massive bone at the Human as part of his "special" attack
  • Should be superior to Snowdin townsfolk such as Ice Wolf, who throws a large ice block routinely (4.78 megajoules)
  • Was able to still move while restrained by four of Flowey's vines
    • Flowey's vines were powerful enough to pull the True Lab elevator to New Home (67.6 megajoules)
    • It should be noted that Papyrus was the only character to be restrained by four vines, as every other major monster such as Undyne, Asgore, and Sans were restrained by only two
  • Has access to the Annoying Dog, who coded, created, and could potentially destroy the Undertale/Deltarune multiverse
    • However, it is incredibly unlikely that the Annoying Dog would cooperate and would be willing to help Papyrus achieve this level of destruction, let alone help Papyrus do anything at all, considering its affinity for stealing his various attacks.

Speed


  • Ran across the town of Snowdin with the Human in a matter of seconds
  • Ran across his living room very fast (16.92 m/s)
  • Should be able to keep up with Undyne, who can run from her house to Snowdin in a matter of seconds (98.84 m/s)
  • Able to keep pace with the Human
    • The Human has dodged attacks composed of sound (197.35 m/s), lightning (57391.30 m/s), and potentially light (though the latter two came from later in the game when the Human could be considered stronger than they were during their encounter with Papyrus. Additionally, it could be argued that Sans's lasers and Vulkin's lightning are magical in nature, meaning that they do not move at the same speeds as actual lasers and lightning.)

Durability


  • Is labeled as having 20 DEF, which is more than monsters such as Napstablook, Greater Dog, and Sans
  • Takes several attacks from the Human
  • Gets electrocuted by his own trap and comes out unphased
  • Is considered "pretty freakin' tough" by Undyne, who stood in the middle of her own house exploding (9.62 megajoules)
  • His Battle Body is capable of absorbing one attack from a LV 8 Human
    • Though the attack left Papyrus as just a head, he was able to continue speaking to the Human for an extended period of time before turning to dust

Weaknesses


Giovanni


While Giovanni is a passionate leader, he isn't exactly the most cunning strategist. His original attempt to break into the Sweet Jazz Museum was incredibly poorly thought out, as highlighted by Mera. Additionally, the fact that he joined the Banzai Blasters, to begin with, shows that he has a distinct lack of foresight and can easily fall for tricks and traps.

While Giovanni makes the absolute most of his rather mundane Epithet, his powers are still quite limited due to the nature of Soup. Other inscribed individuals, such as Zora and her Sundial as well as Indus and his Barrier, are naturally born with much more useful Epithets, naturally leaving Giovanni at a disadvantage when faced against opponents with inherently strong abilities.

Papyrus


Papyrus is a kind soul at heart, which serves both to his benefit and his detriment. Undyne elaborates that the only reason she hasn't let Papyrus into the Royal Guard is because of his kind-hearted nature getting in the way of his physical abilities. Even when he's confronted with a cold-blooded killer such as the Human in a Genocide route, Papyrus still believes that they can turn their lives around and make a change for the better. This tendency to show generous amounts of mercy is what ultimately gets him killed in most playthroughs of UNDERTALE.

Summary


Giovanni


Advantages:
  • More durable
  • Faster if you don't buy lightning-timing for the Human
  • Much more suited for hand-to-hand combat with his Soul Slugger
  • Ancient Potion gives him a way to rejuvenate himself in the middle of a fight
  • Demon Energy Aura gives him a massive mobility advantage
  • Papyrus's style of combat allow Giovanni to easily rack up Critical 13s
  • Might've boned Molly's sister
Disadvantages:
  • Weaker
  • Slower if you buy lightning-timing
  • Jump Form and blue bones effectively counter any mobility advantage he might have
  • Papyrus's nonstop barrage of projectiles leave him without an obvious opening to land the finishing blow
  • Far less ranged options
  • Likely to fall into one of Papyrus's traps
  • The Annoying Dog acts as a wild card that might guarantee his defeat
  • Only got one season

Papyrus



Advantages:
  • Stronger
  • Faster if you buy lightning-timing for the Human
  • Effectively controls the pace of the fight with his massive AOE
  • Outranges via sheer volume of attacks
  • Though the Annoying Dog is almost guaranteed to not help in the slightest, it's always an option should it feel genuinely threatened
  • Battle Body allows for a free hit
  • Better trained and generally smarter
  • His theme song goes dummy hard
Disadvantages:
  • Less durable
  • Slower if you don't buy lightning-timing
  • Likely to tire out sooner due to Giovanni's Ancient Potion
  • Unable to properly defend himself in close-quarters combat
  • His style of attack gives Giovanni plenty of opportunities to charge up a Critical 13
  • His neutral route death sucks

Verdict


AnAustralianPerson



To begin, this is just a great, fun idea for a fight. It features my favorite character from Epithet Erased, and my 2nd favorite character from Undertale besides Sans, but you're not here to see me admire these two kind-hearted gigachads of men. Let's go see who I think wins in a fight between Giovanni Potage and Papyrus.

I just wanna say that these two are so evenly matched in different areas, that who wins is based on what you buy for either. Papyrus takes strength easily and possibly speed, being nearly 60% stronger and potentially 40 times faster than Giovanni via scaling to Frisk's lightning dodging. Meanwhile, Giovanni *also* potentially has a speed advantage if you don't buy Papyrus scaling to Frisk's speed, while also having a durability advantage given the beating he took from Dr. Beefton (aka Sylvie's secret fursona), as well as Indus, meaning he is better than Papyrus in a few ways.

Anyways, both also have a lot of advantages to each other’s attacks. Papyrus has properly trained with Undyne, meaning he's more equipped to actually fight, but at the same time, his kindness can act as a hindrance towards going all out at times, like in the Genocide route. Meanwhile, Giovanni hasn't received proper training from anyone and is self-taught, but he knows when to take things seriously in a fight.

There's also the thing with their attacks and ranges; Papyrus is primarily a long-distance fighter, while Giovanni mainly fights in close range with his Soul Slugger. Who wins this is also based on their given speed. If Papyrus is faster then he can dodge Giovanni when the latter closes in on him. If Giovanni is faster then he can just dodge all of Papyrus's bones and use them to build up his critical hit faster.

On top of that, while Papyrus seems to have a lot of tricks up his sleeve, Giovanni has a lot of counters to them. 

Reset awareness? Far more mild and diluted than Sans or Flowey, meaning it wouldn't be useful in a fight. 

The large number of bone attacks? Giovanni can just dodge them as Frisk does.

His traps and Blue Soul? Giovanni can use Teleports Behind You to jump over them.

Not even the Annoying Dog, the god of the Undertale universe, would be useful, as his attraction to bones would be more of a hindrance to Papyrus than anything. That's not even getting into Giovanni's options of self-recovery and Fog of Lost Souls, abilities Papyrus lacks access to and likely hasn't trained against.

This is why I like Giovanni vs Papyrus so much. Not only does it feature two great, lovable goofballs, but it's also fairly debatable, and who wins is anyone's guess. Plus, it gives us an MU for another non-RT web series, which is a plus.

In the end, though the Undertale fans may be upset by this choice, I believe that Giovanni would win in a fight. He's more durable, potentially faster, and he's less willing to hold back in a fight. Plus, he has the ability to heal himself back up if he were to be hurt by Papyrus. Guess the Banzai Blaster Captain was just soup-erior to Papyrus.

I am not apologizing for that pun.

TreyDaGoat



Yoo it’s another blog lesgooooo

Madara VS Aizen came out and was great, but now I’m stuck with Mr. Yo Thanos himself for the rest of the year and I don’t know how to feel about that. Anyway, I’ll stop sidetracking and get straight to the point: Papyrus from Undertale VS Giovanni from Epithet Erased. THE goofy matchup that has Undertale and gets a Yay because of that alone, but that’s not the question. The question is who I think would win, and honestly, I’d probably say Giovanni based on what we’ve seen from both in their series.

For Papyrus, there are a bunch of different bone-based attacks he can do; he can manipulate the colors of bones to do damage for moving/not moving, increase or decrease sizes of bones, and some people let him use a bone as a sort of sword which sounds funny so let’s include that. He’s smart, obviously, has different traps to use towards his advantage, and, while Giovanni only really has the Soul Slugger and Ancient Potion, his Epithet, Soup, would probably be an issue for Papyrus considering how, from what I remember, spaghetti and soup are similar in ways that would probably affect how he acts in battle, considering how Papyrus can get sidetracked easily in battle. While the same could necessarily be said about Giovanni, he could still keep fighting and boasting about himself, which is somewhat related to what makes this battle super close.

When it comes down to a battle of both having equal stat advantages and disadvantages over the other, it would seem like it relies on combat experience, how they act in battle, and just generally speaking their strategy in battle. But, the issue here is how similar the both of them are; they both talk about how great they are and stuff like that which leaves them open for unexpected moves which would probably end up messing them up in the long run. Considering the abilities Giovanni has, I’d say he has the upper hand even with the similarity the two have. Generally speaking, even if Papyrus is stronger, Giovanni has multiple ways to heal from attacks; he can drink the Ancient Potion which literally heals him of all damage, plus he can use his Epithet to heal over time. Considering I don’t buy lighting scaling for Papyrus since the Human gets stronger over time, Giovanni has the speed advantage to not only take advantage of how little close combat skills Papyrus is shown to have but to dodge his multiple bone attacks consecutively with ease. 

While he does have the disadvantage of not knowing about the color bones or whatever you wanna call them at first, he would obviously learn over time since he’s a skilled fighter even if he gets distracted easily, considering he gets serious quickly when the situation gets to a certain point. Since Giovanni can get the close-range advantage with his Soup in multiple ways (covering the area with fog and moving faster than Papyrus can expect) his critical hit would probably seal the deal since Papyrus can’t counter the close-range attacks due to most of his attacks are long-range moves.

All in all, in an extremely close fight, I’d say that Giovanni wins.

VelvetVessel



It's come to this, the one matchup I love to death but don't wanna see because one of these two has to die. So uuuuuuuuuuh, yeah let's talk about these boys.

Not gonna do the stat pandering a lot of people do because you just read a bunch of math. I'm not making you read more.

So this is basically my verdict… Papyrus kinda just wins. While these two have very little to basically no feats, it's hard to put a number on how powerful they are. Fortunately, you can fix that issue via scaling, and uh… Giovanni doesn't really have anyone to scale to, as opposed to Papyrus who has the main character of this timeline-hopping RPG to be compared to. Now obviously strength scaling is irrelevant since he already has the strength advantage, but here he also gets the edge in speed since a lot of very fast things get thrown at Frisk from Hotland to pretty much the rest of the game. Now it is questionable as to whether they should scale to this but it's pretty obvious that Papyrus is physically better than Frisk at basically everything in the True Pacifist route so I don't see too much of a reason not to scale him to that level of speed. You could argue for something else but uuuuuuuuuuuh, I disagree.

So sadly… -exhale- the absolute chad Giovanni Potage… does not win. He can try all he wants but his fate has been written and we must accept it.

HeavenPiercerChris



Papyrus vs Giovanni, huh. Awesome matchup, but let's get straight to the whole “saying who I think wins” part, which was honestly pretty tricky to decide. Giovanni is a very dangerous foe with his various soup-based abilities, healing, and raw speed being enough for him to land several hits on Papyrus. With his Critical 13s, it's very likely for him to land a finishing blow despite the skeleton being way stronger than the Banzai Blaster's regular stats. 

But, it is my belief that Papyrus's most dangerous and powerful technique can allow him to win. Blue mode and blue attacks are very different from anything Giovanni managed to deal with on his own and he'd likely suffer tons of damage from those alone. Healing would help, but I doubt he would be able to keep his ground for too long even with that. Add in the sheer length and power of Papyrus's really cool regular attack™️ and you’ve got a defeated and captured (possibly dead) human! Also, while the Critical 13 is ridiculously powerful, Papyrus's sheer amount of bones could theoretically make Giovanni waste it by blocking the blow. In the end, despite his skele-tons of effort, Giovanni just wasn't souped up enough to win.

EpicMonkey



Papyrus will lose

Papyrus should kill himself…

NOW!

Give Giovanni a piece of that oxygen

From the Ozone layer

Doctordoombestboy



papyrus solos fiction, thus he stomps giovanni imo tbh ngl

KingCorporeal



Hoo boy. One of my all-time favorite matchups, and it looks like the debate is going dead even at the time of writing this. Looks like I’ll have to step in for a tie-breaker.

So: Giovanni Potage vs Papyrus. I’ve always loved this matchup for how simple, yet fair it is. At the time of conceiving this blog, I thought that one character was going to smoothly come out on top, but I feel that a few calcs that I’ve done recently may sway my point of view on the matter. So, let’s take a look at where I put their stats.

Giovanni’s stats as dictated in the blog are basically where I’d put him: about 30 megajoules in AP from his Critical 13 against Mera, about 180 megajoules in durability due to taking hits from Indus, and about 1400 m/s in speed via reacting to Bugsy. Sounds pretty good.

Papyrus’s stats are a bit more finicky. I’m fine with his strength being about 60 megajoules via scaling to base form Flowey and his durability being about 10 megajoules via scaling to Undyne, but speed is the hottest topic of contention. So, what speeds should we scale him to: sound from Greater Dog, lightning from Vulkin, or light from Sans? Let’s talk about that.

I think Greater Dog’s sound-speed attacks are pretty blatant. Greater Dog barks at the Human, and they are able to dodge the sound of the attack, even moving in tandem with it. This can sit comfortably as our low end.

However, on the opposite end of the spectrum, we have Sans’s Gaster Blaster attacks and whether they’re admittable for Papyrus scaling. I have several issues with this line of reasoning; first of all, we know little to nothing about the damn things. Sure, they move in a straight line, but not nearly enough info is given on them to determine if they’re comparable to real lasers. Additionally, the blaster shows up well before it fires, meaning that the Human very likely could’ve aim-dodged. Additionally, this is the Human at LV 19, far beyond any level at which they can feasibly fight Papyrus. So, no light-speed scaling for Sans's bony brother.

Now comes the most important question: lightning dodging. Personally, I think it’s conceptually fine to scale this feat to Papyrus’s reactions. After all, a LV 1 Human can dodge the attack pretty easily, and Papyrus is shown to be at least comparable to that. My real issue comes from the nature of the lightning itself. Most monsters’ attacks are seen as magical: Toriel’s fire is directly stated to be some form of fire magic. Therefore, it can be inferred that the attacks of other monsters are magical in nature as well. Due to this as well as the unorthodox behavior as the bolts as they leave the cloud, I’ve come to the conclusion that the electricity shot from Vulkin’s cloud is not comparable to natural cloud to ground lightning, meaning that lightning-dodging for the verse, in general, is a no-go. 

So, with that out of the way, let’s take a look at how the stats line up against one another:

Papyrus’s AP vs Giovanni’s Dura: 60 megajoules vs 180 megajoules (⅓ of the damage threshold)

Giovanni’s AP vs Papyrus’s Dura: 30 megajoules vs 10 megajoules (3× the damage threshold)

Giovanni’s Speed vs Papyrus’s Speed: 1400 m/s vs 200 m/s (7:1, Giovanni’s favor)

So, it looks like the stats lean in Giovanni’s favor. Papyrus needs to hit with three times the effort in order to meet Giovanni’s damage threshold, while Giovanni hits for triple the amount needed to meet Papyrus’s. This makes the effective stat gap 9:1, Giovanni’s favor. Add in the seven times speed difference, and things are looking grim for our lad Papyrus.

However, stats are not everything in a fight! Let’s see how their arsenals stack up against one another.

Giovanni’s moveset prioritizes the use of movement: his epithet’s powers allow him to quickly dash around the battlefield, and his close-range Soul Slugger essentially forces him to get up close and personal with his opponent. Papyrus, on the other hand, is the absolute antithesis of this. His moveset revolves around the restriction of movement via the usage of his Blue Attack and blue bones, and he fights primarily using projectiles. Although I can see Giovanni simply outmaneuvering Papyrus’s projectile onslaught, very similar to the human, Papyrus’s skillset inherently provides a fundamental advantage against Giovanni’s style of attack. While Papyrus’s bones provide plenty of opportunities for Giovanni to build up a critical hit, it’s not very likely for Giovanni to be able to use that critical hit without taking several hits himself, leaving the duo at a sort of stalemate.

This is when the final and arguably most important part of their attributes comes into play: stamina. Naturally, whoever has the ability to last longer during the fight should take it, and this is when the tide starts to turn in Giovanni’s favor. Papyrus is confirmed to have a limited number of attacks: he keeps all of them in a closet in his house, after all. Not to mention, his final attack is incredibly intensive on his body, meaning that he’s prone to tiring out after a few minutes of fighting culminating in a grandiose attack. Giovanni, on the other hand, has no such limit on his melee attacks and Epithet-related abilities. Additionally, he has a few tools that allow him to rejuvenate himself in the middle of a fight, such as his Ancient Potion and Fog of Lost Souls, the latter of which could theoretically work indefinitely. Using this, it becomes clear to me that Giovanni has the lasting potential to wear down Papyrus enough to eventually land the one killing blow that he needs.

In conclusion, a noteworthy stat advantage, antithetical fighting style, and lasting stamina reserve lead Giovanni Potage to a victory over the boneheaded sentinel. While the fight truly was soup-er, Papyrus simply lacked the backbone to stand up to the greatest bad guy around.